Have you ever had a day where everything just works?
You sit down, you get started, you focus, and you get a bunch done. You think, “Okay, see? I can do this.”
Then a day or two later, you try to do the same thing, and you can’t get yourself going.
That’s so frustrating, because you know you can do it. You already did it. So your brain starts asking, “Why am I so inconsistent?”
If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. A lot of people with ADHD deal with this.
Inconsistency Is a Real Part of ADHD
There’s actually research on this. Researchers use a term called intra-individual variability. Basically, it means your performance can vary from one time to another, and people with ADHD tend to show more of that variability.
The research isn’t saying exactly why you cleaned your whole house last Saturday and can’t unload the dishwasher today. But it backs up what a lot of us already know from living it.
So when you have one of those days where you’re thinking, “Why can’t I do this? I did it yesterday,” you don’t have to immediately decide there’s something wrong with you.
Something changed.
Ask a Better Question: What Was Different?
Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me today?” I want you to start asking a different question:
What was different when this was easier?
A lot can change from one day to the next. Your energy, your stress, your sleep, how much is going on in your head. Was the task clearer yesterday? Was someone waiting for it? Was there a deadline? Did you have less pulling at your attention?
The same exact project can feel pretty easy to jump into when you know exactly what to do, and like a wall when you have to figure out where to start.
I deal with this myself. There are days when I sit down to write and it comes together pretty easily. Then there are days when I’m staring at the screen thinking, “I know how to do this. Why is this so hard today?”
Sometimes I know what’s different, and sometimes I don’t. I don’t think we need to solve the mystery every single time. We just want to get better at noticing what helps and what makes things harder.
Why Your Good Days Can Make the Hard Days Feel Worse
Here’s one of the weird things about inconsistent performance: the good days can actually make the hard days feel worse.
You have a day where you get a ton done. Then the next time you try the same kind of work, everything feels harder.
That’s when we start using the good days against ourselves. “I did this last week. I know I can do this. Why can’t I do it again?” We take one really good day and turn it into a standard.
Other people can do this too: “Well, clearly you can do it.” And yes, you can. But that doesn’t mean every day is going to look like your best day.
Your best day is not your new minimum. It was just one day.
Use Your Good Days to Learn What Helps
So instead of using a good day as proof of what you should be able to do all the time, look at what was going on when things worked well.
Don’t just enjoy the good day and move on. Ask yourself, “What helped me here?” And then use the answer:
- If having the first step decided helped, start deciding it ahead of time.
- If accountability helped, find a way to build that in more often.
- If you got more done because you worked earlier in the day, remember that when you’re planning similar work.
You’re looking for things you can repeat.
Then on a harder day, look at what’s missing. Do I know where to start? Am I exhausted? Is this too vague? Is too much competing for my attention?
Then make just one adjustment. Clarify the first step. Ask someone to check in. Give yourself 20 minutes instead of two hours.
Plan for Harder Days With Minimums and Maximums
This is where minimums and maximums can really help.
Your maximum is what you can do on the days when you have plenty of energy and things are going well. Your minimum is what you can do on the harder days.
If you’re going to have some inconsistency from day to day, you need another option besides doing everything you planned or doing nothing.
There have been days when it’s 10 o’clock in the morning and I’m already thinking, “I don’t have much in me today.” But I also don’t want to throw away the entire day.
So I ask myself, “What’s one small thing I can do right now?” I go do that one thing, and then I might rest for a little while. When I’m ready, I ask again, “Okay, what’s the next small thing I can do?”
I’m not trying to turn it into a super productive day. I’m working with the day I actually have. And often by the end of the day, I’ve gotten quite a few things done, because I kept doing the next small thing.
Maybe you can’t clean the entire room, but you can clear one surface. The amount changes, but you’re still moving forward.
Try It: Compare Two Days
This doesn’t have to be complicated. Let’s say answering email is something you’re really inconsistent with.
One day you sit down, open your inbox, answer what needs answering, and you’re done. Another day you open your email, look around, close it, and tell yourself you’ll do it later.
Instead of saying, “Why am I so bad at this?” look at what’s different. Maybe on the easier day you did it first thing in the morning, or you had 10 emails instead of 40. Maybe on the harder day you were tired, or sat down without knowing where to start.
Now pick one thing to change next time. Answer email earlier. Start with just five. Sort them first. Give yourself 15 minutes instead of telling yourself you have to clear the entire inbox.
Next time, you’re not starting from scratch.
Find Your Own Patterns
You don’t have to match your best day. Some days you’ll do more, and some days you’ll do less. The goal is to know what helps you and have a plan for the days when things are harder.
To help with that, I made something kind of fun: the ADHD Performance Pattern Finder. It’s a short interactive quiz that builds your personalized plan, so you can see what’s working, what’s not, and what to try next. The more fully you fill it in, the more it can help, and you can come back to it again and again.
Take the Performance Pattern Finder here: learntothrivewithadhd.com/patternfinder
Want to hear me talk through all of this? Listen to Ep 139 here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1954263/episodes/19944367
A short ADHD coaching series is coming soon. I’ll share more when it’s ready.
